I wrote this about two weeks ago, but never got around to posting it...
***
 
It is funny, starting up again after the Christmas break...
The  closest analogy I can think of to my experience of last semester is  getting pegged in the head when fencing.
For those of you who do not know, I did rapier fencing for several years, and because of the heavy construction of a rapier blade, much  of the force of a blow gets transmitted down to the end of the blade,  rather than simply bending the blade sideways as it would with an  Olympic epee or foil.
Getting hit is never much fun, and always hurts,  but getting hit hard in the head is absolutely the worst.  Your head  snaps back, there is a burst of pain, and you end up completely  disoriented.  You stand there, dazed and confused trying to remember  what in the world just happened.  You don't know where you are, who you  are, or what just happened.  And within an instant you have to push all  that aside, and throw yourself back into the fight to protect yourself,  while most of you is still not quite sure just what is going on.
And,  of course, because I'm way shorter than most of my opponents, my head  was a fairly easy target, so I spent more than my fair share of time  dazed and confused after being cracked in the head before I learned to  keep my guard up really high!
   I feel like I spent most of last semester getting smacked hard in the  head by various things, and I think I went through a lot of it dazed and  confused.  And right now I'm warily eying this next term (my opponent?)  keeping my guard high and really hoping I don't keep getting smacked in the head all this term too!
I guess it might be lucky that I tend to find the challenge of  figuring out how to engage in the fight well somewhat energizing?  I  know I have better strategies, and now that I have the beginnings of a  community here for support as well, I think over all, things will be  much better.  Well, the fight is about to begin, so: Bring. It. On.
Monday, January 23, 2012
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